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Ann Lander’s advice column was the first thing I would read in the daily paper.

These days, I peruse the funeral notices – keeping a sharp eye out for the unique, the ones written with flair and humor.

I usually leave those pages disappointed, as most obits are formulaic and boring.

But not this one:

CANNELLA, Theodore Frank “Ted”

"Passed away…at age 77, leaving the world without its most beloved, soft-hearted, and utterly irreverent tough guy. Ted grew up in South Tampa as the son of a first-generation immigrant from Sicily and second-generation immigrant from Austurias, Spain.

As a boy, he attended Christ the King, where he developed a faith that would be his rudder later in life, despite his distaste for rigid religion of any kind.

Ted was…relentlessly doted upon by his loving mother…and spent his free time doing what he loved most, fishing. Ted was unusually gifted with both brains and brawn…he was a dead-ringer for Elvis in his college years. He reveled in the fact that most southerners never quite knew what to do with the Italian from Tampa with the greased-back hair.

True to form, he eschewed what he viewed as the preppy and pretentious atmosphere of Greek life. He focused instead on playing guard for the Rambling Wreck and raising absolute hell with his extended football family.

He graduated in 1966 with a degree in financial engineering from Georgia Tech and more epic stories than most people amass in a lifetime…

He spent his happiest years living on Cabbage Key, where he had a front row seat to a beautiful mangrove sound every night next to his favorite person, his devoted wife Gigi. Guests walking down the nature trail could hear laugher and music coming from the house before it came into view. He and Gigi hosted countless guests…showering them with Jimmy Buffet music, Gi’s excellent cooking and Ted’s legendary Caesar salads. There may have also been some alcohol or what not involved, but no one can really remember.

Ted’s marriage to Gigi was long and happy. They worked together, fished together and weathered life’s storms (including two actual hurricanes) together, hand in hand, inseparable until the very end. Ted was Gigi’s fiercest protector and Gigi was his biggest cheerleader….laughter, a shared faith, and a refusal to sweat the small stuff was their secret recipe for a marriage that was both full of love and genuinely fun.

Ted loved his family deeply. He did all the things that fathers do, of course: he coached little league, attended dance recitals and stayed up till 3 am putting together doll houses and bicycles. But his unique style of love was to speak openly and honestly to his children, to admit his errors in life, to try to spare his own children from making the same mistakes he made.

Although he only had two biological children, he was like a dad to many more. He took us fishing, philosophized with us, laughed with us, encouraged us, made fun of us and loved us. His laugh, his foul language, his cunning wit and his absurdly loud sneezes will be sorely missed by all who knew him…"

This obit above is a perfect template for how I want to be captured when I depart this world – my imperfections acknowledged and my strengths celebrated – and all the words stitched together with forthrightness and humor.

What more can I ask?

Well, one more thing: I wish I had known Theodore Frank “Ted” Cannella.

This article was originally published on Iris Ruth Pastor's website and has been republished with permission.

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About the Author;

Iris Ruth Pastor has published more than 800 columns on everything from bad hair days and unruly children to reinvention after the nest empties in newspapers and magazines. She is an author and her most recent book, The Secret Life of the Weight-Obsessed Woman deals with her personal journey of overcoming addiction - specifically an eating disorder. She has been featured on NBC News, CBS News, Fox News, and many others. You can find out more about Iris and subscribe to her weekly newsletter on her website.

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