Discovering a Retirement Connection with "Mr. B"

Writing a book is hard. Managing a website is hard. Creating presentations is hard. Coaching people who are experiencing retirement shock is hard.

But what makes all the energy and effort of these activities worthwhile is when someone provides you feedback that what you are doing makes a difference in their lives.

Recently we received the following note from a reader “Mr B” (not his real name) about our new book “Retirement Heaven or Hell” that I wanted to share with you.

Here’s what he had to say;

“I just wanted to reach out to let you know how much I appreciate your new book. I read it earlier this month and it really helped bring clarity on my retirement situation and why I have not been satisfied.

I feel like I’ve been in “Retirement Purgatory”…. some good, some bad, unclear what direction I’m heading or how to achieve happiness.

The short version of the story is that I retired nearly two years ago (3 weeks before the COVID lockdown) at the age of 54. It was my decision to leave the workforce, but I did so because I had been so miserable for the last 10 years of my 30+ year career. I was tired of working in toxic environments and I was completely burned out.

On the positive side, I had finally reached financial independence and I had contemplated what I’d do in retirement for at least 2-3 years before I pulled the trigger.

I had a purpose (tangentially related to my profession) and I’m also very structured (my last job was to lead strategy development for my organization) -- I plan and execute complex, multi-year activities like breathing air.

That said, I was concerned your book would not help me figure out what I was doing wrong, but nothing could be further from my experience reading your book.

What I discovered is that I was “swinging for the fences” in my retirement endeavor and I expected be successful, albeit unrealistically. When things did not progress as I has hoped, my ego kicked in (subconsciously, of course) and by doubling down on my efforts to achieve success at my PURPOSE, I ignored many of your other 9 Retirement Heaven Principles. I began to relive past experiences from my career and I began to resent former colleagues. What I was doing basically felt just like work... mainly because my ATTITUDE was all messed up.

I also didn’t belong to any TRIBES. Big Fail.

While this is probably not the typical enlightenment you expect your readers to have, I wanted you to know that even a purpose-minded, strategic planner can gain insight from your wisdom.”

I reached out to Mr B to thank him for sharing his feedback with us. While I was speaking with him, I felt like I was looking into a mirror at my previous self. He was also a person who had a good career but failed at retirement and ended up in retirement hell.

Mr B and I both struggled with letting go of our pursuit of money and satisfying our egos. We both also fortunately recognized this was a problem that was holding us back and needed to eliminate in order for us to advance towards a successful retirement.

After talking with Mr B I am confident he will do well and I can’t wait to see all the things he will accomplish. The extra bonus of this encounter is that I also ended up gaining a good friend all because of a book.

It’s funny how life works sometimes.

About the author;

Mike Drak is an author, public speaker and recognized authority on the non-financial aspects of retirement. After having spent 38-years in the financial services industry, Mike retired and personally faced what he called “retirement shock”. During this time, Mike found himself on a journey of self discovery and authored two best selling books on retirement; Victory Lap Retirement and Retirement Heaven or Hell: Which Will You Choose?. Mike is a Senior Contributor at Booming Encore and dedicates his time to helping other retirees design a fulfilling, meaningful retirement lifestyle for themselves.