Ask a Retirement Coach: I'm Bored and Unmotivated in Retirement
Dear Retirement Coach;
I just recently retired and am really enjoying being away from the stress of my job. But during the days now, I just can't seem to get motivated to do anything. As a result, I'm feeling like I'm just not getting anything accomplished. Do you have any suggestions on what I should do?
Dave
Dave, let me start by sharing what research has shown to be the most prevalent fears that pre-retirees face as they approach retirement:
Declining physical and mental capabilities
Loss of identity
Feelings of irrelevance
BOREDOM
It sounds like there’s a element of boredom at work here. Maybe exacerbated with a touch of identity loss and feelings of irrelevance.
Let’s work from the basic definition of boredom:
“-feeling tired and unhappy because something is not interesting or because you have nothing to do.”
What you have described has the earmarks of drifting into retirement with no plan for the psychological side of retirement.
Don’t feel alone – 2 of 3 retirees don’t plan for that side either.
Remember why you showed up every day for work, even thought it was stressful?
Because there was a component of mission or goal or something to do or something that had to be done. It too may have been boring and short of inspirational but at least it kept you acting. You’ve now jettisoned that and are feeling the effects of action missing from your life.
Why are you feeling this way?
You are going against the way we are wired up as humans. Look – some retirees thrive on doing nothing.
Fortunately, you aren’t one of those. Your subconscious and your essence is sending you a signal that this isn’t right for you. You need to honor that and put a goal – any goal – in front of you and work toward developing something that will motivate you to get up in the morning.
Passion is overrated.
Don’t sit around contemplating and waiting for your “passion” to fall into your lap. It won’t happen.
The very concept of passion can be something that will keep you out of action. Many people end up doing nothing because they are frozen by their inability to find or follow their passion.
What they fail to often realize is that by doing something, this will actually help them find something they may be passionate about.
So act on something. Anything!
Your brain is a teleological device – it will follow what you put in front of it. Stop the atrophy and put a goal in front of it and act on it.
I’ll leave with some simple words from Mark Cuban: “Don’t follow your passions, follow your effort. It will lead you to your passions.”
Interested in more Retirement Coach advice? Be sure to check out these other articles;
Do you have any questions about the non financial aspects of retirement that you would like a Retirement Coach to answer? Send them to [email protected].
About the Author
Gary Foster is a former executive healthcare recruiter, over-70 “portfolio-career” guy, and audacious ager dedicated to helping folks in the over-50 crowd adopt a new, healthier, and more purposeful perspective on the second half of life. With national certifications as a retirement coach, résumé writer, and online presence expert plus over 18 years of career coaching and recruiting experience, he coaches, speaks, and writes publicly on the issues of mid-life career transitions, planning for purposeful retirement, and achieving better health and greater longevity. You can reach Gary through his website: Make Aging Work.
